I’m not sure why, but I find myself all too often feeling disappointed. Sometimes it is in situations, other times it is in people. I’ve spent far too much time moping around about everything from what-ifs to relationships, and perhaps more than anything I find myself wallowing in disappointment for me. In the end, none of it has gotten me anywhere.
I often sit and ponder why disappointment has such a power over me. No immediate scriptures about disappointment come to mind, and it has since occurred to me that perhaps disappointment is only a symptom of a deeper issue. Scripture speaks a lot to anxiety and fear, and I think that disappointment is an outcropping of that feeling.
When I am disappointed in myself, I can honestly say there is an aspect of anxiety. Thoughts of doubt and worthiness creep in: “What if I’m not good enough?” “What if that was my only chance?” “What if I’m never able to do it?” These thoughts are, at their core, matters of trust. Our faith is in ourselves and our own ability, and since we will fail left to our own devices we panic. The same goes for disappointment with others. We have set their actions as the end-all and judge them and ourselves accordingly. This is the way that many of us live, even without knowing it, and it is doomed to be filled with anxiety and eventually hopelessness.
As always, scripture has another answer. We are told countless times to trust God, not ourselves. We are to lay our fears and anxieties on Him. He is to be our refuge and strength and we can know that He is steadfast, no matter our imperfection. Clearly this is no easy feat; if it were God wouldn’t need to remind us so frequently. It is, however, important.
God has a plan, and regardless of how you believe He is working it out, He is. Like any loving parent, He doesn’t want us to be stressed out and ineffective. He wants to use us for all His glorious works. We are the ones who get in the way because we continually look to ourselves for results instead of looking to the one who will judge our works in the end. So long as we keep our eyes on Him, laying our anxieties and fears at His feet, then we know what His response will be.
“Well done, good and faithful servant.”
Pax,
-Paul Hart Cochran